Back in January I wrote about coming out to my family and mentioned that I didn’t have a big ah-ha moment when it came to realising that I was gay.
There were no questions. I didn’t struggle to figure myself out. I just was. Which was great until now.
Now, at the age of 28, the questions arise. With that comes the ups and downs, the what the fuck moments, the decision to either be the person I thought I was or the person I am now and the things, said and done, that have meant unnecessarily dragging others into my year of confusion.
Reading this post over on F is for… got me thinking about public displays of affection and they’re not something I normally give much thought to.
It’s not something that bothers me; gay, straight, trans, bisexual, or none of these, I’m unlikely to pay attention to whose hand you’re holding or mouth you’re kissing. Unless you’re actually standing in my way in the street or sitting in front of me in the cinema and distracting me from the movie then my view is do whatever makes you happy with whoever makes you happy (as long as you realise you’re in public obviously). Even then you can continue to do as you please but be prepared for me to ask you to move out of my way first.
How often have you taken one look at someone and made assumptions about what kind of personality they have, what they do for a living or who they sleep with that?
The who I sleep with assumption happens to me a lot because…shock of all horrors…I’m a feminine looking lesbian (femme) and this seems to confuse the hell out of people.
I’ve lost count of the amount of times I’ve been asked, by people I barely know (we’re talking friends of friends and the like), what it was like to ‘come out’ to my family and friends.
My answer really depends on the tone in which the question was asked, more often than not I reply with ‘Well, how did it go when you told your parents you were straight?’ This normally leads to people staring at me with a bewildered look on their face while I try not to laugh. Although one guy did say that he hadn’t gotten around to breaking it to them yet
As a gay woman in Ireland, and proud of it, Eamon Delaney will no doubt view me as one of the ones that ‘want to increasingly change mainstream culture to suit them’ but I’m here to put him right.
Now I know Delaney stated in the piece that he wasn’t
‘being reactionary’ and is
‘all for gay rights and an end to prejudice and discrimination‘ but frankly if you’ve read it then you’ll know that is clearly not the case (here’s a link just so you know what I’m talking about).