Review copy of Paulina & Fran by Rachel B. Glaser from the publisher, Granta Books, included. No affiliate links used. You can read my full disclosure policy here.
Queer fiction is not a single genre. Queer characters can and should appear in everything from Sci-Fi and fantasy to crime fiction. Queerness is not some “other” that can be ignored. Nor should it be ignored.
I’ve spoken before about what queerness in literature, TV, film and music meant to my young gay self. And what they meant to my twenty-something self, when I realised I was bisexual. Representation matters.
Younger me was particularly drawn to female queer characters, so the majority of this list is compiled of lesbian and bisexual women.
My marriage equality referendum memories are bittersweet. We did it, it passed and that’s brilliant but it came at a high price to a lot of people. LGBTQ+ people literally had to knock on doors and ask for the right to get married, which was humiliating even when the canvass was positive.
The ‘No’ side were given airtime and column inches to spout hateful nonsense and lies, but we weren’t allowed call it homophobia because “balance”. Let that sink in.
On a personal level, the realisation that bi-erasure was a deliberate tactic by the ‘Yes’ campaign and not an oversight was difficult to swallow. Bi+ and trans people were made to feel at worst, like their experiences didn’t matter and at best, like allies in a campaign that directly affected them. So many bi+ and trans people worked their arses off, despite having their critiques silenced, because that’s how important the referendum was.
These experiences meant that the joy of the result was tinged with relief, sadness, frustration and anger for some LGBTQ+ people. I am delighted marriage equality passed, but (a) it never should have come to a referendum and (b) solidarity wasn’t there for the entire LGBTQ+ community.
I wrote this piece about being bi+ and living in rural Ireland for the Cork Pride guide. I submitted it before the Orlando shootingwhere 49 people were killed and 53 others injured. The aftermath of this homophobic act of terrorism makes safe spaces for LGBTQ+ people all the more important. On a personal level, I missed not having an LGBTQ+ bar/space close by so I could visit in the days following the massacre.
I’ve been trying to find the right words since I heard about the shooting in Pulse, a gay bar in Orlando, but all I have are tears, anger and the ability to retweet people who are far more articulate than me.
On Friday May 22nd Irish people will vote on whether to extend civil marriage to same-sex couples. I hadn’t planned on writing a blog post this close to the referendum because, frankly, since the campaign officially began I’ve been too angry and wound up to write anything sensible. But having written two longer than usual Facebook updates recently, I decided to combine them and elaborate here.
Two months ago I was lucky enough to get married. I say lucky not just because I am happily married to the man I love, but because the option of marriage has never been open to me before as my previous long term relationships were with women.
Paul and I had a small civil ceremony in Dublin. We invited family and close friends, chose two songs and a reading (you’ll find it here), said our vows and signed our marriage certificate. The entire ceremony took less than 30 minutes. But they were a wonderfully moving 30 minutes. Making that commitment to each other and having it recognised was important.
There’s no denying that the introduction of the Civil Partnership and Certain Rights and Obligations of Cohabitants Act 2010 was a big moment in the fight for equality for members of Ireland’s LGBT community.
For the first time same-sex couples were able to have their relationships legally recognised by the State. However, it doesn’t go far enough. There are still over 160 differences between civil partnerships and civil marriage.
On Monday Kerry County Council became the 14th local authority, since July 2012, in Ireland (including Northern Ireland) to pass a motion in favour of marriage equality.
With the latest Millward Brown Lansdowne poll showing that 75% of people would vote yes in a referendum to extend civil marriage to same-sex couples it’s encouraging to see our local politicians back equality on this issue. Even if it is only a symbolic gesture.
Yes, there has been vocal opposition, by some councillors, to these motions but they have been shown time and time again to be within the minority.
Back in January I wrote about coming out to my family and mentioned that I didn’t have a big ah-ha moment when it came to realising that I was gay.
There were no questions. I didn’t struggle to figure myself out. I just was. Which was great until now.
Now, at the age of 28, the questions arise. With that comes the ups and downs, the what the fuck moments, the decision to either be the person I thought I was or the person I am now and the things, said and done, that have meant unnecessarily dragging others into my year of confusion.
I’ve lost count of the amount of times I’ve been asked, by people I barely know (we’re talking friends of friends and the like), what it was like to ‘come out’ to my family and friends.
My answer really depends on the tone in which the question was asked, more often than not I reply with ‘Well, how did it go when you told your parents you were straight?’ This normally leads to people staring at me with a bewildered look on their face while I try not to laugh. Although one guy did say that he hadn’t gotten around to breaking it to them yet